The Ludlow Family

Cheerios on my yoga mat

2011-12-23T10:17:00.001-08:00

Really? That's the post I decided to take a break on? It's been since AUGUST that I last wrote anything! Good grief (hey, it's Christmastime, you know that everyone is watching Charlie Brown). This post is about something I deal with at least a couple times a week: working out with children in your house. Children who happen to be awake at the time you are trying to work out, in the same 4 inch space as where you are trying to do a downward dog, chaturanga, round-house kick or whatever! I think you see my point. It is so cold here that running at 6:50 in the morning is not really an option I like to choose. Nor is going outside to do my yoga like I do in the summertime. So it means in the living room, next to the wood burning stove; which on the plus side gives you a great sweat session! The kids see me start my workout, and that means immediate requests for: hold me! water, please! shoes on! I went potty - come wipe me! When those are declined, ignored (except for the potty one, that's just a mess waiting to happen otherwise!) then the kids fall into the dance of doing what mommy is doing....right next to me. Which means I dance around trying to find an open area to kick or stretch. OR they eat snacks right next to me which means I am stepping on cheerios and whatnot the whole time. The best (and by that I mean worst) time is when the dog decides to get into it too. There's nothing like a downward dog pose where your dog starts licking your face while you're trying to concentrate on your breathing. I'm complaining, I know. But it's also kind of fun sometimes. Especially when I lay down to do ab stuff, and the kids take that as "jump on mommy!" time. But that's some great tickling, airplane, bonding opportunities that I take time to enjoy. The whole point of working out is to be a stronger me, and a better, happier, fitter mommy for the punks. What would be the point if I didn't include them? As a reminder for myself, and all mom's that are trying to be healthy - there will be lots of time to namaste without the extra noise and craziness. I should just be grateful that I have healthy, happy kids that want to be wherever I am - because I know that when they are teenagers, I will probably be low on the list of people to hang with (I hope not, but it's most likely gonna happen.)

I love you this big

2011-08-10T22:28:00.000-07:00

So in the past week, I went from this:

Showing off the muffin top (hey, it was baby tummy in the making!) Being very excited, and once again very surprised that I was expecting our 4th baby!
To:
............................................nothing. Just me again.
I miscarried on Tuesday, at roughly 6 weeks along. I had been feeling fine, a little crampy that morning, but nothing big. I ran errands all around town for a couple hours, getting ready for Sydney's 2nd birthday party, feeling about the same. But when I got home the cramping intensified, and when I used the restroom there was bright red spotting, along with some lower back pain. This isn't my first rodeo - I know that brown is okay, light pink is fine, but bright red is bad. So I called my doc - I still hadn't made an appointment, because I knew they would want to wait until around 10 weeks anyway - but just to see what they thought. In the time it took for them to call back I had started bleeding pretty heavily, and when I spoke with the nurse, I said " I don't need you to confirm it, I know what's going on." I went to my room, and said a prayer and cried for a couple minutes. Then, told myself to get it together, because there was nothing to be done for it, and there were quite a few people coming over for Syd's party. Kevin got home and though I had talked to him on the phone, telling him in person was so hard. His face just fell. The rest of the night passed in a blur, and when night came, I just felt numb. Today however, has been full of emotions. Mainly, "was this my fault?" I ran with a team last weekend for the Cascade Lakes Relay, and the 12 of us ran a total of 216.6 miles from Diamond Lake to Bend. I can claim 12.5 of those miles. I can't help but wonder if I pushed it too hard, or if my lackadaisical attitude towards this pregnancy caused me to do too much in general in life. From everything I've read, miscarriages in the first 12 weeks show a problem with the fetus, whether in implanting, or in the chromosomes, but not with the mother. That's comforting, but it's really hard to shut the voice in my head up sometimes, that says in a small way that I've failed. I've taken my mom's advice today though, and let myself mourn the loss of what could have been. I put housework, and all other things to the side, and just played with my children and enjoyed them and the cute and funny things they do. I look at them and see so much joy and happiness - they make everything right.
Kevin also took me out tonight, we went to Fred Myer at the bakery counter (don't judge! Everything there is delicious!) where we got these treats,

then went to the park to just be together and talk. I am so grateful for him - even when he drives me insane - he is my best friend, and he reminds me again and again we are always in - whatever it may be - it together.
It's a very hard things to describe your feelings when you miscarry. And I don't want to go on and on, because really, I could. But I choose to focus on the bright side of this. First of all, this has shown us that we really aren't done having kids. We thought for sure that 3 was our max - but when we found out I was pregnant, we were over the moon. We're not done after all. Maybe not for a little while, but definitely not done. And secondly, it confirms our faith and belief of eternal families. That baby, whether boy or girl, is mine. Ours. For all eternity if we live the Lord's commandments, and I want to hold him or her in my arms. While I may not get the chance to do that here, I know that I can. I heard this song on the radio on the way home, and the end lyrics are what I would say to this baby:

I Love You This Big lyrics

So much bigger than I ever dreamed my heart ever would
I love you this big
And I'd write your name in stars across the sky
If I could, I would

I love you this big
Oh, eyes have never seen... this big
No-one's ever dreamed... this big
And I'll spend the rest of my life
Explaining what words cannot describe but, I'll try
I love you this big

Busy June

2011-07-03T09:55:00.000-07:00

Wow, this has been quite a month for us! At the beginning of the month we had family pictures taken by the amazing Maria Alexandra, of Maria Alexandra Photography (Here is the website www.mariaalexandraphotography.com ) We absolutely love them! Here are a few:

After getting the pictures done it was Father's Day, and I (Becky) had a BBQ to put on with my side of the family - hot dogs, chicken, salad, and these yummy and cute brownies!

That day I had a 5k race called "The longest day" since it was at 7:30 at night! My sister in law Jill ran it too, and she kicked my butt! However, I did do better than my last race, so it was a good run for me.

Sunday was Father's Day, so it was a day making a big breakfast, a talk at church, and then dinner at my in-law's house for Rick! Monday was
our Lexi's birthday - I can't believe my first baby is 3 already.....

So crazy - 36 hours of labor and 2 hours of pushing, and what was crazy is I would do it all over again! She is such a light in our house, and we love her more and more every day. Happy Birthday, little peanut.

We did have a party for Lexi the following weekend - we waited because Uncle Andrew came home from Texas!! I will post the pictures from the party later.
Then, let's see, we're up to the 28th of June now, we decided it would be great to take 3 kids camping with Uncle Andrew at the coast. Quick recap:
3 kids, 3 adults (sort of, maybe just 1) 1 tent, 3 days, 2 nights.
Sand. Lots of sand.
Sunburn - a little bit :(
Dirt. Lots of dirt.
Tantrums - a lot from the babies, a couple from the grown ups too.
Sleep. Some of it.
S'mores, giggles, chipmunks, food, hot chocolate, walks, lessons learned and memories made - lots of them.

When we got back (this is getting to be a really long post!) on Thursday, I had one night to recuperate, and then it was Party Time! My parents have been married for 40 years - 40 YEARS! - today, the 3rd of July. We planned a surprise party for them on Saturday night out at my brother Matt's house with about 45 people there - granted, our family alone makes about 25 - It was great! My dad knew date and time, but it was a total surprise for my mom, who cried and called us all liars and sneaks (In a good way, I promise). I'll also post more about that later, with pictures.

All in all, a crazy, fun filled month, and it all wraps up with the 4th of July tomorrow - a day of:
A race for me! My first 10k in Ashland - wish me luck! More BBQ, bubbles, swimming, A NAP, and awesome displays of light and fire tomorrow night. Andrew goes back home Tuesday morning, and then things (maybe?) will calm down around this place! Well, really, with 3 kids, as much as things can calm down I suppose!
Happy 4th of July everyone! Yay for America!!

Perfect

2011-02-18T15:07:00.000-08:00

I watched this video, and thought, I've got to share this (that is, in between my tears I thought that) I've got to write how I feel about this.

I love this song. I've got it downloaded on my ipod, on my playlist, every time I hear it on the radio I turn it up - it's something I need to remind myself of. It is so easy to let myself believe I should be someone else, that I've become a boring mom, that I'm overweight, that I'm a bad wife.....the list could go on forever. But instead of tuning into that negativity, I push it away. I don't need excuses, I'm perfect being me. I especially need to hear that when I worry about working out, that I'm not getting the results I think I should - to remind myself that I am not working out to get skinny, to fit in, or look like a celebrity mom. I'm working out to be strong and healthy and a more awesome me. I caught up on Glee last night, and watched the episode where they were looking for an anthem - well, for me this is my anthem today (I reserve the right to change it as I see fit). I am more than a number on a scale, the van I drive, or the mom jeans I currently wear :)Even if I never worked out again, I am perfect just the way I am, and I am a child of God. I need to remember to tell my kids and my husband that important lesson every day, and also everyone I'm around - because we all need to know that.

Count your blessings

2011-02-04T14:48:00.000-08:00

I'm going to take a page from Matthew Henry ( a 17th century theologian and bible scholar.) He was once robbed, and later recorded in his journal (I'm summarizing this) Let me be thankful. First, that it was the first time I was ever robbed. Second, though he took my purse, he did not take my life. Third, though he took all my money, it wasn't much. And fourth, that it was I that was robbed, and not I who did the robbing.

So today, I'm going to be thankful. Here is the background, and I really hope I don't come off as Debbie Downer! For the past week, I have had three sick babies, and I am sick as well. Sydney woke up Saturday at about 1 am with croup, and a double ear infection (again!) Lexi came down with something Sunday evening, and ran a fever of an average of 103.5 for about 3 days, then came down with pink eye! Austin has had a cold since Monday, I took him to the Pediatrician's today, and it turns out he has RSV (a respiratory virus that's really hard on babies) and now he has to have nebulizer treatments to help his breathing, and not get any sicker or he could be in the hospital. I have been sick since Monday, spiked a fever of 103 on Wednesday, which thankfully broke the same night since Kevin took over and I slept for almost 13 hours straight! Kevin was also gone on Monday and Tuesday for business, and also has to work during the day, so I've pretty much been flying solo except for yesterday, when he came home around 1 pm.
I have heard that happiness is a frame of mind, and I'm trying to cultivate it. Here is the list that I have come up with over the course of today, while washing, cleaning and sterilizing nearly everything in my house! It's amazing the amount of laundry that has to be done when everyone is sick!
1. So thankful for modern medicine, like Tylenol, nebulizers, and antibacterial eye drops. I'm also thankful for homeopathic medicines, like saline spray, honey syrup for coughs, and earache drops.
2. Thankful for access to competent, reliable doctors and nurses, who really are just a phone call away. And on that note, pharmacists as well.
3. Family members who have helped with advice, and running to the pharmacy for medicines (Thank you Matt!!)
4. That I can stay home, without having to take time off work, or find a sitter. I know that this is not the case for everyone, and to each their own situation. But for me, I am very grateful to be able to stay home and cater to their every need.
5. A warm home to be in, with hot water, electricity - one that is clean, dry and safe. I know there are so many others that are without these basic needs, and my heart truly aches for them, and how hard that must be knowing that where you live may be the cause of your baby being sick.
6. A husband that is willing to take more than his share to help me through all of this.
7. Prayer. Because I know that Heavenly Father has heard every single one of mine, especially the ones at 3 in the morning when I am so tired and frustrated and congested and feel like I cannot keep going.

And that's where I'm going to end this post for now - there are so many other things, too many to really list - but life is calling and I have to take care of sickies. Be thankful everyone!

Working out is really, surprisingly working out well

2011-01-25T00:09:00.001-08:00

All my life, I have been obsessed with being thin. I was happy, but always wanted to weigh a little bit less, have the curves in the right places though - basically I wanted to be lean, but with curves at the same time. And I was always slightly disappointed with my body. Not so much that anyone would notice, but still, always there. That all changed when I got pregnant with Lexi. Suddenly, I had this amazing body that could carry a baby in it - it was amazing! And I didn't have to worry about being thin, because heck! I was pregnant, buddy! It felt great just to be me, and not really freak out about if my jeans fit, because really, they all had elastic waste bands anyway. Along with that came the I can eat what I feel like train of thought - not such a good idea when after I had her, the weight didn't just disappear! I felt the same when 4 months later, I was pregnant with Sydney! And then, after that, with Austin! Now, with Austin, I really had learned my lesson from Lexi - I needed to eat better. So, I only gained what I needed to with him, and it came off about a week after I had him. Now I need to work on getting rid of the extra weight from the previous pregnancies! But really, I don't care about weight now. I have four goals: One, fit in my wedding jeans, which are the jeans I fit in when I got married. Two, run the Pear Blossom for the 5k - and run the whole way. For me this is a big goal, because I hate running. I'm trying to change that perspective, one mile at a time. Three, successfully complete p90x - which involves two things: One, all 90 days working out. Two, being able to do 15 of each kind of push up, wide, military, regular, and at least one pull up without a chair! And the fourth goal is the Portland Sprint Triathlon in August - 750 m swim, 20k bike, and 5k run. I don't have times to beat, I just want to finish it! All of these goals give me the ultimate benefit - a healthier me. I have stopped caring about being skinny. I want to be strong, strong from head to toe (my toes will be doing curls!) I need to be tough to keep up with these kids of mine - I'm greatly outnumbered! I want to be able to push my body to be stronger, faster - not worry about the number on the scale. I would say I'm not doing this for anyone else, but that's a lie. I'm working out for me, yes, but I'm also doing this to be a stronger mom, more active with my kids. I'm also doing it to look hot for my husband! But ultimately, to have a sense of satisfaction in setting and finishing my goals, and I really miss my jeans! So good luck to me!

Kind of cheating....

2011-01-10T15:32:00.000-08:00

So I feel like I'm kind of cheating on my blog, because these aren't my original thoughts, but they are two poems that have been going through my head today. The first was in a book of poems I had as a little girl.
Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow…

For children grow up, we’ve learned to our sorrow.

So quiet down, cobwebs, dust go to sleep;

I’m rocking my baby, and babies don’t keep.

I feel like my days are just so full of the cleaning and fussing, and griping about how I can't wait for them to be big enough to leave me alone for 20 minutes! But then I look at how Austin is already changing so much, and then I look at Lexi and Sydney and see how big they are already. Lexi can put her shoes on by herself. She can get things out of the fridge and put them back. She's going on the potty already! And I want to rewind to when she was a baby and I could rock her to sleep. Sydney is talking more and more, which I love, but sometimes I actually miss those late night feedings with just me and her and the house so quiet at 2 am. So today, when they get up from their naps, my housework can just pound sand.

This is a poem my mom has on her wall, and I love it - She also has a plaque with this funny ugly little lady on it that says "Housework makes you ugly"

I will not have a temper tantrum nor stomp across the floor.

I will not pout, scream or shout or kick against the door.

I will not throw my food around nor pick upon another.

I’ll always try to be real good because I am the mother.

Oh boy, there are days where I really feel like this! Everything that comes out of my mouth gets repeated, so the days of the cuss-slip are over!! Now it's all internal :) And from my mouth you get things like cookie crumbles and biscuits!

What's 2 + 1 = ? Really full arms!

2010-11-23T10:52:00.001-08:00

It's been 4 weeks since little Austin arrived - all 10 pounds of him! Since this is how I looked before I had him

It still came as a bit of a surprise that he was THAT big! So the story:
I woke up Tuesday morning to some contractions, which wasn't a surprise because I had been having false labor for almost 2 weeks, so I was more annoyed by them than anything, because I thought they were faking me out again. I figured they'll either keep going or not, so I decided to make banana bread. About an hour into it, the contractions were getting stronger and closer, so I called my sister Jan who dropped her schedule for the day and came right over, only to drive me to the hospital an hour later! My thinking at first was that at the hospital I could at least labor without kids hanging all over me! When we got there though, it was a good thing we left when we did, because my contractions went to about 2 minutes apart! Checked into the hospital, Dr. Tomlinson came in and guesstimated his weight at 8 1/2 lbs - so I said I didn't want an epidural. If I had known his actual weight, I think I might have been a bit more freaked out about it! It got pretty intense after they broke my water, and man did it hurt! But I knew what was going on - and I was prepared for it - more so than when I had Lexi or even Sydney, so I just breathed through and dealt with it! About 8 hours after my contractions started I delivered him after about 3 sets of pushes! Plus side to that - it was over fast. Downside - his face was black and blue because it was fast!

He had his first BM while he was still inside, so it was pretty gross when they broke my water, but the plus to that was the RT (respiratory therapist) was already there, which was really good considering the cord was wrapped around his neck (contributing to the blueness) so when he didn't breathe after they cut the cord I didn't really freak out because I knew he was in good hands (and the best equipment!) My strongest memories from labor are how glad I was to have such a great support group in there with me! My sister Jan was a rock star - she seriously could be a labor coach, she was so calm and soothing for me :) Also having my my in-laws Tracy and Nicole in there with me was awesome - two nurses! I also remember when I started pushing Kevin's face looked so horrified/grossed out that I yelled at him to get away - move next to me so I couldn't look at his face - it freaked me out! And then, when his head was out the Dr. was trying to twist his shoulders/unwind the cord from his neck and so they were telling me not to push. Well, anyone who's been in labor knows that your body is pretty much taking over, and it's doing what it needs to in order to get the baby out - not pushing is pretty dang hard! Tracy got in my face and told me to pant so that I didn't push (otherwise, he could have broken his shoulder or collarbone, or ripped me up pretty bad.) Now, when I hear the word "pant" I think of Lexi acting like a puppy, so I automatically stuck my tongue out and panted like a dog!! I only did it for about 3 seconds before I realized what I was doing, but it's on tape, and it will forever be there!
All in all, I really couldn't have asked for a better labor and delivery - I had a huge baby without hurting him or myself in the process (well, aside from the bruising.)The bruising went away after about a week, and now he is just so dang cute!

He's such a mellow baby - he just goes along for the ride with his sisters who just love him - a little too much sometimes! We are so blessed to have these beautiful, healthy and happy babies, and love being parents. Even with the throw up, dirty diapers and 2 am feedings!

Phrases

2010-10-28T14:35:00.000-07:00

So until I can post the fun and gory details of my labor and delivery of Austin Craig, here is a list of phrases from that time that are sticking out in my mind the most.

1. Oh, snap this really hurts!
2. You don't mind interns do you?
3. Kevin if you answer that phone during one of my contractions again and you are within reaching distance I will punch you.
4. No, I don't WANT an epidural!
5. Okay, I think I want some IV meds now.
6. @$%#^&$%^@#$^*&*)()(%^^%%%&* (Okay, that part was internal, but I admit, it was there!)
7. Kevin, you have to move I can't stand the way you look so horrified!
8. Push! Wait, don't push! *sob!*
9. He's out!
10. He's huge!

I'll end the list there for now :) I will post the whole thing in a few days!

A Monday List

2010-09-13T21:22:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged in a while. Sorry. But I figure, it's the start of a new week, so I will try, try, try again and we'll see how long it lasts. Because there are lots of little things on my mind, I'm just going to make a list.

1. The only guaranteed time that I will get to have to myself the entire day is in the morning, when I take my shower and blow dry my hair. And the morning usually starts one of two ways - Kevin leaves for work and I make myself get out of bed before the girls wake up so that I won't feel guilty and rushed. Or, Kevin leaves for work, I hear feet hit the floor, followed by "Mommy? Where are you?" Then I make myself get out of bed, sneak past their door and into the bathroom, fingers crossed that she won't get lucky and be able to open the door by herself. Then I feel guilty and rushed. Either way, it kind of sucks because I have to get out of bed.

2. I made 7 quarts of salsa today. I'm just now finishing the cold pack process, and I'm really glad I didn't burn it.

3. I made a pouch sling today. Still shaking my head over the fact that I paid $40 for my first one, that I think got stolen, and that's why I can't find it and why I found the pattern online and made a new one that cost me $10 and an hour of my time.

4. Pretty sure that our GPS got stolen at the same time.

5. I'm completely in love with my husband. I don't tell him that as much - I say I love you, but I need to remember to tell him that I'm nuts about him too.

6. I changed 9 cloth diapers today.

7. I Helped Lexi and her "babies" Tigger and Puppy use the potty today. Once, I had to sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes holding Sydney, reading books to all 4 of them. If I didn't show the pictures, Lexi said "Mommy! Puppy didn't see!"

8. Washed, dried, folded and put away 5 loads of laundry today. Heck yes.

9. I have watched Wonder Pets more than I care to keep count of. Even Kevin keeps whistling the theme song for it .

10. I hate to throw away food, even when it wasn't that great and I know it will probably rot in the fridge because no one will eat it, I just can't bring myself to throw it away after I've made it.

11. I have eaten 8 mini Twix bars since I brought them home from Target at 6pm - that's like eating 2 1/2 of the full size candy bars. Darn you mini's for making me feel like I'm not eating much.

12. I have an OB appointment tomorrow. I will just say that the baby must be gaining weight like a champ because I have no idea where these pounds are coming from! (Refer to #10)

13. I have 7 weeks left ( I hope, I hope, I hope that it's not more!) until my due date and I feel like a walking barn. It used to be a walking house, but that invokes images of a cute little house with shutters and flower boxes. Nope, now it's a barn....with a cow in front.

Potato Bug

2010-06-04T16:36:00.000-07:00

So this morning while Sydney took her nap, Lexi and I went outside to play and pull weeds(which, to a kid I've discovered pulling weeds is like playing! Yay!) I'm really glad I was wearing gloves (in order to squish the unsuspecting but grody looking spiders that randomly run out) because then THIS came up out of the ground, like some freaky alien ant/bee/grasshopper.

It's called a potato bug, Jerusalem cricket, spawn of Satan, bald devil fetus and earth fetus - to name a few nicknames! They are basically pretty harmless, live under ground, and are omnivores, so both bugs and plants are on the menu.
So what did I do when I pulled up the weed and the potato bug came crawling out? What any normal (relatively) mom would do - I called for Lexi to come and look at it while I tried to keep it from disappearing back under the overgrowth and then potentially dig itself far far away from me! Lexi stared at it with a mix of interest and revulsion, but wouldn't get close enough to really look at it, so I ran into the house and grabbed a mason jar to trap it. Then she really looked at it and man was it interesting! Those things are so freaky looking, but I don't want her to have bug phobias, so I introduce bugs at every possible opportunity, along with teaching her how to squish the bad ones.
All of this leads to my story with the potato bug when I was 16. One summer I worked for a couple in our ward at their ranch, doing whatever they had for me - weeding, cleaning, hoeing, etc. Basically manual labor at its finest! One day I was weeding up this big patch of ground, when my hoe brought to light a potato bug! It wasn't like the picture, this one had been underground so long it turned into an albino, so it was very pale and HUGE, like 4 inches long I kid you not. Just like Lexi, I stared at it with fascination and revulsion, until I decided I needed to get back to work, and it was just going to keep grossing me out. So I chopped at it with my hoe, but it only separated the front from the main body and here is the super gross part - the head turned on itself and started ripping the body (the part with stripes) apart with these ginormous mandibles!! I almost threw up, but then just chopped it into little bits (sadistic I know, but it went against the laws of nature!) and covered it with dirt and went on about my day - not to really be thought about until we found another one this morning. To be nice, we let it go and covered it up with dirt, partly because I don't want Lexi to be sadistic and squish bugs just because they look gross, and also because I didn't want to throw up if it ate itself like the last time! Lexi then ran off to her sandbox and I decided I was done with weeding for the morning.

Happy Things

2010-06-01T22:37:00.000-07:00

Since last night, and then all throughout this day, I have been thinking about things that make me happy. Isn't it funny how just thinking about the things that make you happy, can actually make you happy? It started last night, when Sydney woke up at about 10:30, so I got her a bottle and went in the girls' room to tuck her back in. As she lay there drinking her bottle with her eyes closed I rubbed her cheek, and then she reached up with both chubby little hands and just held my hand (pinky in the left, index with the right) just happy to be close. Of course I had to get her out of the crib and snuggle her for about 10 minutes after that! So I think that will start my list
1. Snuggling with my girls after they've gone to bed and are half asleep. I sneak in their room all the time and just watch them sleep, and I can never resist picking them up and rocking them.
2. Hanging out on the couch with Kevin with our legs wrapped up watching a movie, tv, playing a game, heck I don't care what we're doing as long as we get some 1 on 1 time!
3. Watching the girls learn new things, whether it's Lexi being able to jump off of something and not get hurt, or when Sydney learns a new babble or when she figured out how to play peekaboo.
4. Showing Lexi bugs for the first time - she thinks they are really cool now.
5. Doing my nails. I really enjoy being able to give myself a manicure and a pedicure - I like going to get them done too, but there is something really relaxing about the whole process when I do it myself.
6. Plucking eyebrows - weird, I know, but I like to pluck other peoples brows - not mine because well, it hurts and I always get a little obsessed with them.
7. Baths, but only in big tubs, like my sister Tiff's or in my parents claw foot tub. Any other ones just make me feel ginormous and chubby.

There are about a billion things that make me happy, but for now that's all I have time for, because it's late and I need to hit the hay - Oh! That's another one!
8. Clean sheets (which I just put on my bed) and a freshly made bed......ahhhh.....

What a day....and it's not even noon yet

2010-05-17T11:43:00.000-07:00

You would think, that since I woke up facing this (fyi, I don't always have this many dishes, but I cleaned out my fridge and all the little science experiments growing in it).

And this

AND this (dirty cloth diapers to be washed and rinsed throughout the day!)

Not to forget these two, who require every second of my attention (unless I can distract them with food and Kipper the Dog....I love Kipper with all my heart)

All those things in mind, plus calling the dermatologist for Kevin and the other 1,000 little things I do all day, you would think that it would be horribly unfair for anything else to happen. And it was,oh it was unfair that Sydney decided to greet me with this when she woke up.

I was up at 7:30, showered and working on my medical transcription when they woke up at 9:15. They were both laughing and happy, so I left them alone until I was done with the chapter I was working on, so about 9:40 I went in to get them and was greeted by two smiling girls, one was clean and one was covered in poo - and laughing. Nary a tear or wail from her, she must have just felt better from getting it all out! So to keep my sanity, I laughed. And gagged. And opened the windows and grabbed the camera. Then I put them both in the tub and scrubbed em! Then I cleaned the crib and put all the sheets in the washer. And my husband wonders why he sometimes comes home to a house that's dirty. I think I really took those pictures as evidence of what I do all day!! Now that I've shared my days grossness with you, I must go finish cleaning. Ta!

Bain

2010-05-06T23:22:00.000-07:00

Tonight I am feeling very sad. We took our dog Bain to the pound, and left her there. And when I say we, I meant me, because Kevin was at work and I had to go by myself. Just 5 months ago we picked her up from that same place. When we got her, I wasn't even planning on getting a dog, we had taken a bag of dog biscuits, paper towels and some other stuff for donating there, and decided to look around, and there she was this little ball of fat and fur - she was adorable, like all puppies are at first. I should have gone with my instincts on her though, I remember thinking she's kind of a loner, and not super enthusiastic like all the other puppies in her group. But she was the only all black one, and the sign said Boxer/Lab mix - and Kevin really wanted(wants) a black lab. So I paid the hundred bucks and took her home. As she started growing though, it became very obvious that she was not a boxer mix, but rather a pitbull/lab mix. I had a pitbull, and American Staffordshire Terrier if you will, named Tink the tank because that girl was solid! I also had to give that pitbull away, because my parents homeowners insurance wouldn't allow pits - only a couple companies do - I gave her to a friend with a pit of his own, and they got out of the yard and attacked his neighbors poodle. I loved that dog a lot, and she was wonderful with people, but she definitely had a pitbull nature - high small prey drive, dominant nature, very protective - I wouldn't say I'm prejudiced to them, but they are not the breed for me. Flash forward through housebreaking, learning not to bite, or steal the kids toys(never quite succeeded, she always managed to sneak them away)and the pitbull side of her started coming out. She trapped our little old neighbor between her car and garage and wouldn't let her by, she chased after Lexi in the backyard, and started becoming very territorial. All of this led to a phone call this morning to Kevin, saying "I think she needs to go to the pound" and Kevin saying, "I was going to call you and say the same thing." I miss her a lot already. I didn't have my footwarmer while I was doing dishes tonight, or have to remind her to go outside and do her business. Those that know me, know I've had a lot of dogs. Diz, Tink, Lani, and now Bain. Does this mean I'm not a good dog owner? Or is it the wrong breeds? Or just bad timing? Bain was the first dog that I felt I truly gave all I could to, time, energy, training, love, and it just wasn't enough to change her nature. Or was it my expectations of her? I just worried that she would get out and hurt someone, and now I worry that she will just linger in a kennel, wanting people to love her, but being to excited they will say she's too high maintenance or high energy for us. And wondering why we don't come get her. I don't have anything really witty to say right now, or endearing. I'm just sad.

My IUD experience - it wasn't great!

2009-11-20T12:18:00.001-08:00

Ok, so this is not endorsed by any doctor - in fact, my dr. basically said he didn't buy it and that I was full of it. I am not stating that this happens to everyone - but it happened to me and if someone reads this and it helps them that makes me very happy. Let me start by saying that you alone know your body better than anyone else, and if you feel like you don't, start paying attention to it! You know when you feel good, normal, sane, healthy etc. I was pregnant for practically two years - 20 months with a 4 month break between babies. I felt crazy, cranky, pissy, pick your adjective for psycho pregnant lady! After I had Sydney, I decided I didn't want to be pregnant again for a loooong time, at least 2 years. So after talking with my sister Jan, who has the Mirena IUD and loves it - no period! no daily pill! Just insert and you're done - the most effective birth control you can get pretty much and it sounded sweet to me. Discussed it with my husband, who didn't think I should get it because for some reason he likes crazy-hormonal pregnant Becky (wait, he likes the baby that comes after that, duh)told him I wanted it and that was that. Went to the dr, and let me tell you - I have read so many posts from women about how much it hurt to get put in and I have to say what a bunch of wimps - did you just push a baby out of you or what? And yes, I had an epidural so it's not like I'm a masochist or anything - but come on, it's just a little pinch, take a Tylenol before and you will feel just fine. Anyway, left the office feeling great and expecting to move on with my life. Then came the side effects. I'm listing these in the order that I realized they happened, I didn't put it together that it was my IUD until after a month and a half.
So I started getting horrible stomach cramps about a week later - my entire stomach from ribs to pelvis would ache, wake me up in the middle of the night and keep me up - Tylenol kind of took the edge off but they never really went away. These were worse than the cramps I had on the pill, but on their own, I think maybe I could have handled it. They would give me diarrhea, then I would start to throw up. Then came the headaches. I've never really gotten them, the occasional one that would go away with some medicine. These lasted for days, againm Tylenol took the edge off but they never left (excedrine migraine worked great though!) Now for the weirdness - my left hand started going numb - well, maybe numb isn't the right word, it was that weird, "I'm waking up" tingly feeling from my elbow to my fingertips on my left hand. All day and night - weird huh! Then my foot started falling asleep at random times - my left foot - doing dishes, playing with the girls, you name it. I commented to Kevin, this is weird, maybe my circulation is bad, or maybe my chair at my desk isn't ergonomical isn't that odd haha and we would just pass it off as my body being funky. I also started staying awake at night, jumping at every little noise, worrying about everything under the sun. So the day came when the stomach cramps woke me up at 4, kept me up and lasted for 2 days - keep in mind I have a 3 month old - I NEED MY SLEEP!!So I started Googling.....ahh, Google what would I do without it? It's my answer for everything..."I don't know, go google it" So it brought up the stomach cramps, headaches as normal side effects. Then I saw "left-side numbness" and my ears perked right up - huh. I have that. huh, my arm started going numb around the time that I got the IUD. huh
I pretty much avoided the "Mirena sucks!" postings and tried to stick with basic explanations, and the more I read, the more I felt and knew that this thing needs to get out of me stat - I talked to Kevin and he completely agreed that it was weird. I called the dr. and had to explain that instead of checking on how it was doing, I wanted my IUD removed. My nurse sounded worried that the dr. would not be happy about it but I said that's what I wanted so see you Wednesday! I printed the page from drugs.com about the side effects that also stated numbness and took it with me. After explaining all to my dr. he went to his office to check the internet and came back saying he didn't buy it, and that if I gave it a couple months I would be just fine. He also pointed out several times that I had wasted $800 of the taxpayers money (let me point out that due to becoming unemployed after finding out I was pregnant I was on OHP, my state health care). I stayed calm - even though I wanted to yell and say that we paid our taxes just as well as anyone else, and I didn't care if it was $800 or $8000 - I didn't feel right! But I didn't, I just calmly repeated that he didn't have to believe me, I know my body and I know that it's not normal for my hand and leg to be numb, that it started around the time of my IUD being put in, and I don't think that was just coincidence. I think I said that 3 or 4 times - I know my body and this is not right, I want it out. He said that maybe it was something else, my body produces these hormones on their own, it might be neurologic and I just kept saying sorry, I want it out. I feel pretty proud of myself for sticking to it, and he said that if I hadn't been so determined he would have tried to talk me out of it even more. He really laid a guilt trip on me though, and I was pretty embarrassed about "wasting the tax payers money" even though I have a right to it as much as anyone else, and I have a right to know what works and what doesn't for my body. Like I said before, if it was stomach cramps and headaches, that I can deal with, but the numbness was seriously freaky. Anyway, he apologized and said that I was his patient and I was more important than the state - Damn right!! A little pinch, and it was out again. I KID YOU NOT - THE NUMBNESS IN MY HAND WENT AWAY IN 3 MINUTES - I was putting my clothes back on and told Kevin, "it's gone". It's been 2 days, and it hasn't come back at all. I fully believe that my IUD caused it -nothing will convince me otherwise. I feel better already, but not completely myself, that will take a little bit for my hormones to regulate themselves. I wonder if there is a nerve that was being pinched - like how accupuncture and accupressure affect certain parts of your body when you activate specific areas (ie, spots on your foot promote healthy liver function). I get freaked out when I think of if I had left it in, would that have caused serious nerve damage over time? That's my own little theory on it though - the body is so complex who can ever predict it?
Another little tidbit I've been thinking on, they say that babies who are nursed with their mothers on the Mirena, which releases progesterone, have elevated levels of steroids in their blood. They say that this really doesn't affect the babies - I may disagree. Sydney has been fairly constipated since she was about 1 1/2 months - around the same time that I got the IUD. I know, babies will sometimes go 2 to sometimes 10 days without pooping occasionaly, but Sydney will poop once, then go anywhere from 5-10 days before going again - EVERY TIME. I worried about Hirschsprung's again (see earlier posts with Alexis) but that's not the case. I have to wonder about this IUD, and will post again if I notice a difference in Sydneys bowel movements now that I have this thing out of me.
So I guess what I learned most of all is to trust myself. I wasn't about to let anyone bully me into doing something that I knew was wrong for me, and I would recommend anyone reading this to 1) research the hell out of any birth control you are about to use, or for that matter, any kind of drugs you are using, and 2) If something isn't going right, stand up for yourself! I feel so bad for the women that got talked into waiting for it to even out, when they had so many side effects that were so much worse than mine, and now their bodies are seriously messed up. Go with your gut feeling, it will usually be the best FOR YOU.

Facebook

2009-07-25T09:58:00.001-07:00

http://www.playlist.com/user/39678006/dashboard

So close to going home....

2009-03-22T09:44:00.000-07:00

Sorry to all who have been reading that I haven't written since after the surgery, pretty much anytime she's awake I'm holding her, or when she sleeps I sleep! It's kind of like having a newborn all over again! She is doing so well, she was able to have "clears" yesterday, so she got to have Jell-O and some juice, it's funny she's never had jell-o, and she loved it! She had this cute little pink mustache, since the spoon was a little too big for her mouth. They took the drain, or stint out of her tummy yesterday, I didn't get any pictures of it, since they (the surgeons) always come around pretty early and I never think of taking photos. So her - wound? slice? future scar? I'm not sure what to call it, but where they cut her open and where her stoma used to be is healing up really nicely. She has two places with stitches and they are different types. They are both internal though, so we can't see them. Her stomach has about a 2 1/2 inch cut, and it looks like the skin is pinched together on the outside, so it's just a long line that goes from the left side of her tummy to just a little past her bellbutton. The stitches for that will disolve in about 4-6 weeks. Directly under that is a little criss-cross cut, that was where the drain came out, they just took it out and it's been closing on it's own. Then, the stitches at her rectum are just inside, they basically took her intestine where it had been attached to her tummy, then pulled it down to her bum then stitched it in place. Those stitches are "permanent" they won't dissolve, but they will eventually work their way out (months? years?) and the scar in place will keep her attached. When we change her diaper you can see one little stitch sticking out, that's the only way you know what happened! She is completely off the IV meds, and going on Tylenol during the day, and Tylenol with codeine at night. She was able to eat solids, they said she can go back on her regular diet, but supplement with fiber so that her stools are soft, cause the last thing we want is strain and a potential ripped stitch *ouch*! They say that maybe we can go home today, but she needs to poop first after eating all those solids, so potentially not until tomorrow. We just want her to be 100% ok before we go off and try to do this on our own! So here are some more photos, you can always go to Kevin's facebook account to see more pictures.

Day after.....

2009-03-20T12:14:00.001-07:00

Surgery was a success! We went back to see her (she didn't get out until about 5pm) and she had her eyes about half open, but when I held her hand she just squeezed and wouldn't let go for anything! When I would try to pull away she just held on tighter, it was so cute. She had a pretty good night, and actually slept for quite a long time, so I got to sleep for a long time! Here are the wires in her - 1)heart moniter attached to her toe 2)catheter, umm you know where! 3)she has two IV's, one in each foot, but only one is being constantly used. I think they are using the other one for her medicines 4)an epidural from her back and 5)an NG tube, for sucking up her stomach contents, that reduces inflammation and the risk of infection. Oh, I forgot, since this one isn't hanging out, she has a drain from her stomach where they stitched her colostomy closed. She still can't have anything to eat, since it will just get sucked back up through the NG tube, but she has a lot of fluids going on, and doesn't seem hungry. I gave her a couple small ice chips this morning (I LOVE hospital ice, Tiff and I call it pre-chewed ice, because it's so crunchy and yummy!)not for her to drink, but so that she could wet her mouth and throat since it was so dry and her coughs sounded so scratchy. she seemed a lot better after that. She is very attached to me, it makes it hard to leave and go back to the RMac house to take a shower and eat, since she cries when I'm not there. Kevin is holding her right now and she's sleeping, I think if she had it her way she would just have us hold her all day and night. Oh, and she pooped!! It really hurt her, I felt so bad, but it wasn't an actual food poop, just what was left in her bowels going the restof the way through. She's been tootin all morning though, and it's really so bizarre to hear it from her! Kevin and I just look at eachother and go, "was that you?" because we forgot already! I have pictures of her after the surgery and just hanging out now, but i forgot the cord at the RMac house, so I will post them later tonight.

Lexi at Doernbecher...Day of the Surgery

2009-03-19T14:25:00.001-07:00

Warning: This rambles quite a bit, sorry :)

So we are here in Portland, Lexi is actually in surgery right now and I am listening to a little kid screaming his head off down the hall. We came up Tuesday night, her appointment was Wednesday and they admitted her at about 4:30 pm. They started her on a clear liquid diet, and that went on until about midnight, then they had her just with an IV and nothing per mouth. They also had begun her bowel prep, which was this medicine that they had going through her nose/stomach tube, that was called "go lightly"..... Baloney! That stuff had her filling her bag completely every hour! But as the night (and endless hours of no sleep) went on her stool became more and more clear, and turned yellow, which is just mainly stomach bile. She wasn't scheduled for surgery until 3:30,so when Kevin came back(he stayed at the RMac house overnight, and we stayed up with Lexi) Tiff (she came up last night) and I decided to go back to the Ronald McDonald house (the most awesome place, especially when you are away from home and your baby is sick, or having surgery) and do some laundry (considering that she had thrown up all down my shirt when they put the nose tube in, and then I had poop on my sweats and on my shirt, and two of her blankets) We had some breakfast, and had just gone to the room to take a nap - since the longest chunk of time we slept was 2 hours straight - when Kevin called and said they moved her surgery up, they are sending a transport team to take her down. In hospital time that could mean 5 minutes, or up to an hour, you never really know. We booked it back to the room, no shower, still only 5 hours of sleep- really crappy sleep honestly since I was on that hard chair that folds into a bed, Tiff was on the window bed, and I had to hold Lexi all night, she screamed every time I put her down, and if I left the room like, to go to the bathroom it took a bit to calm her down when I got back! Anyway, all of that to wait about 1/2 an hour, then go down the operating "base" and wait there about another 1 1/2 hours! So they are still in surgery, and this has been since about 12:30, they said they will come out and update us about 1 1/2 hours into it, but still no news yet and it's been 2 hours. They are going to sew up her colostomy, take her intestine down to her bum, literally pull it through and stitch it directly to her rectum. She will have stitches in 2 places, so she will be very sore for a while, and on some drugs to keep her happy. She most likely won't get to eat for at least 1 full day, and then after that on a special diet for a couple weeks to let her stitches heal up so that nothing tears. We will probably not be released to go home until Tuesday, maybe later depending on how she is doing with everything. So here are some pictures, and her are some videos we've taken- she has actually been so happy and smiling for everyone and she loves the nurses (when they aren't shoving tubes down her nose or sticking needles in her legs!) because they have stethoscopes and pager/phones around their necks! She looks pretty sleep deprived in some of these though, and a little stoned since she is giving this cheeseball grin all the time. Soon though she will be back to her normal self, being our happy little peanut!

Rough night

2009-03-09T08:20:00.000-07:00

(Lexi and Daddy last night when it randomly snowed!)

(I hadn't showered yet, but she actually smiled with me!)

( I love her little tennies, they are from Auntie Beth)
Poor Lexi....She has gained the weight she needed to, so we scheduled her surgery for this Thursday (we scheduled it a few weeks ago)and everything has been a go. We are leaving for Portland tomorrow, she has pre-op on Wednesday where they will admit her into the Doernbecher Pediatrics, and then surgery Thursday morning. So we've been living in fear of her getting sick, since she has to be in prime health for this to happen, and everything has been fine. Kevin had a really bad cold last week, so we kept them away from eachother as best as we could. I'm not a germaphobe by any means, normally I think it's great for her to be around some germies, so that she builds a strong immune system - don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna hand her to someone visibly icky, or someone with chicken pox!I just don't freak out about her getting dirty, or if someone doesn't wash their hands before they hold her, ya know, stuff they say all new moms do - Well I don't! Anyway, she wakes up yesterday with a cough, I'm thinking, "this isn't horrible" Then when I get home from church, Kevin is changing her bag and says "I don't know if she has diarrhea or what, but this thing exploded!" And lo and behold - she has diarrhea. Now, having experienced this, many moms will say "no big deal, she poops in a bag how bad can it be?" Let me tell you - BAD...REALLY REALLY REALLY BAD. See, she goes in a bag, but this stuff is so acidic, it just eats right through the seal, and literally rips her tummy up until it has open sores and is bright red like a burn, which means new bags won't stick because I can't clean it without causing her a lot of pain - that happened last time in the course of about 1 1/2 days. Oh, and did I mention that we planned her bags down to the wire - she had 6 left? HAD mind you, HAD - she has 3 now. They send me 30 bags a month, and then I have to wait a month to reorder, she had diarrhea 3 weeks ago, so I can't reorder without a prescription. Oh, and last time, she had weighed 17lbs 10oz, so we scheduled the surgery, then she got sick for 3 days, and lost a pound because of it. So she can't have this for very long, because if she doesn't weigh enough they won't do the surgery. So I'm stressing out quite a bit about this, but we had Kevin and Mike DeKorte give her a blessing last night, which said she would have her surgery as planned. I have faith that she will be ok. I had to wake up every 2-3 hours last night to empty her bag in the sink, which would wake her up, then give her pedialyte and rock her back to sleep. Otherwise, her bag would have leaked everywhere, which is a lot worse! So she is still sleeping right now, I was getting ready for work and it was like a voice said "what the heck are you doing? You need to stay with her today." So here I sit, venting and complaining and waiting for her to wake up so she can have rice and applesauce. You know what's funny though - I honestly love being a mommy. If someone had told me all of this before hand, I would have said no way! There's nothing else I want to be now. Oh, there she's waking up now, I'll blog when we get to Portland as well as post photos.

For Aubri

2009-01-29T20:18:00.001-08:00

OK, I'm not dead, we are doing fine, Lexi is awesome and SO BIG! Kevin is in fabulous health...that's the run down! Hahaha, Aubri said if I blog nothing else, I need to put down the basics so that she won't freak out and think we are dead or something. So here is a little more in depth on the basic. Lexi had her 7 month check up today, she goes to the Dr. about once a month for a weight check and stoma check. She weighs 16lbs 14oz - so close to 17! I talked to the Dr. about her surgery, he will email the surgeon in Portland and ask if we can schedule it in the next month, even though she isn't fully 18 lbs yet. Hopefully he will say yes, and she can have her surgery and then we can move~we think to Austin, Texas. We are pretty sure that is where we should be, but we are waiting for a little more confirmation. We're going to fast on Sunday, and that should be enough to know. I have an appointment (my 12 week? Who knows?) on Tuesday the 3rd to check on the little fishy (that's the baby in my stomach in case you didn't know). Hopefully he/she is doing awesome! I'm not really sick anymore, even though the mere thought of spaghetti makes me want to upchuck - for some reason it really made me sick before, and since Lexi loved it, I would blend it up for her, but then she would burp spaghetti during her night feeding and make me sick again! Oh, that reminds me...she had gross spaghetti breath two Sundays ago, and it was making me queesy. So, my hubby, with sweet intentions took her out, and gave her a Listerine strip!!! He brought her back into sacrament, and she was spitting all over the place trying to get the taste out....so sad, but so funny! And her breath was a lot better after that!! So that's about it....updated! Will post more later.

Finally! The secret is out!

2009-01-11T21:03:00.000-08:00

Ok, it's been a long time since I've written anything, and that's partly because the holidays were a busy time for us, and partly because I've had a secret, and I have a hard time keeping that in when it changes everything! I am pregnant - again! It was a complete shock, I thought I was just getting the flu since I was exhausted, and just not feeling so hot. When it hit me, I just knew, and I took the test, and there ya go! So we got into the doctor pretty quickly, and he guesstimated my due date as sometime in late August. We are happy - well, Kevin has been excited since I told him, and it honestly took me a good week to truly be happy about it. I still sometimes get that deer in the headlights look when I talk about it! I'm happy, but sad because it means I will be quitting my job, which I really like and feel like I was moving up with it, but I have to do what's best for my family. It's just not what you expect when you are nursing and on the pill - but it is what it is, and we will love this baby just as much as Lexi. Speaking of Lexi, she is currently screaming her head off right now, she has been having such a hard time going to bed, and so tonight we're just letting her cry it out. It's kind of hard to just do nothing though :( So, I have pictures from a ways back - I made a dress! I cut out the pattern, and sewed it all together and I am pretty dang proud ofmyself! Only problem is that it didn't fit Lexi! She is just in between the newborn and small size, and by the time I was done there was no way I was doing anther one! So this is it I'm really proud of it though! So maybe somewhere along the way, I'll be able to have one of my babies wear it! Also, Lexi got to meet Santa at our ward Christmas party - it was late, and I thought she would scream at him, but I set her on his lap and she just got the biggest grin on her face and started playing with his beard. The lighting was off and our camera isn't very great but it's still really cute!
We are so close to moving into an apartment...it's been nice to save money and pay off debt though, so I can't complain about it. We are looking, but it's hard to find one in the 8th ward that isn't really expensive, or a piece of junk and still really expensive! So that's about it for us...busy as can be and loving all of it! I know it's late but Happy New Year! What is everyone's resolutions? Mine is to floss at least once a day... so far I'm sticking to it!

Bond....James Bond

2008-11-29T13:44:00.000-08:00

So I admit it....I am a dork for James Bond movies....not just because he's handsome and charming, mainly it's for the explosions and really bad-A cars. We saw Quantum of Solace last night, and we both liked it, so I recomend everyone see it!

more animals
I am also a big dork for www.icanhascheezburger.com ........

The past two weeks....

2008-11-11T18:25:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I've been pretty busy lately. I took a part time job at Harry & David working in the mail room doing data entry. The first week was horrible, I had to work from 9-2 at Lanphier, then get Alexis, then be at training at 3:30 and work until 11:30 - ALL WEEK. Then last week I worked from 6-11 a few days. It wasn't so bad, Lexi goes to bed at about 6:30, but it was the getting home so late that killed me. And Kevin didn't really want me to work there anyway, and it wasn't like we had to have the money, so I quit. I don't like quitting, it makes me feel like a loser. But, I quit and it will all be ok. So anyway, going back a couple weeks...we went to a pumpkin patch to pick out our punkins...it was fun! We were a bit obsessive about the ones we picked though, Kevin likes the tall thin ones, I wanted one shaped like a basketball, and we wanted one in between for Lexi's.

So we took em home and pulled all the guts out (I made pumpkin seeds, they were yummy!)

I don't have pictures of her in her costume with me right now, but as soon as I download them I'll post em. All in all, a pretty fun fall season - Now it's timefor thanksgiving!!

Busy bee...

2008-11-11T09:19:00.000-08:00

So life has gotten the best of me and I've been busy! Two jobs will do that to you! I have pictures of Halloween, and other stuff, so I will blog tonight.

Football

2008-10-29T11:08:00.001-07:00

A little background......
So I don't know how it happened....somehow, I've married a man who doesn't like football. Wait, let me clarify, he doesn't like watching football in any form - college, high school, jr. leagues, nada. I, on the other hand, LOVE football (I know, total gender/role reversal here!) I don't care so much for pro (iffy) but I love college and high school football. My theory is that growing up my brothers played, and so I always went with my mom (my dad had to work a lot) to their games, then in high school, I went with my friends, to watch my friends play (not boyfriends, I actually had friends that were guys). Not just to goof off, but to actually watch the game! Kevin says I'm just stuck in the past, and it helps me relive high school (ugh, not so sure I want to do that again!) but really, honestly - I LOVE FOOTBALL!!! It's just part of the fall season for me, pumpkins, the sweet/sour smell of apples, a little bit chilly, hot chocolate, the colors, all of it! And the season is not complete without a game!
So, going back 2 1/2 weeks - I asked Kevin is we could go to a game since we didn't have anything else going on, he said NO. I begged, I pleaded, I even managed to get a little teary eyed because he was so selfish! He said...NO. Then fate intervened. His mom works with a lady who had season tickets for North Medford, and she wanted to let us use them! So not only was it something to do - it was free! Kevin wasn't thrilled, but he went. And I got to go to my game! It was great, but he made me leave before the end, and it went into overtime and North lost 27-28 and I missed it! Grrrr... so then last weekend I called my sister and told her I would take the girls (Kayleigh and Addy)to the North/Grants Pass game - and North lost again! Dissapointing because going to Crater always made me think that North always won - see at least with Crater I knew they would lose! Anyway, I got it out of my system and now I am prepared to move on to the other holidays - like Thanksgiving~ mmm....turkey coma......

Because everyone loves Kevin......

2008-10-26T14:09:00.000-07:00

The Husband Meme - I snagged it from Aubri's blog!

1. What is his name? Kevin Craig Ludlow

2. Who eats more? Ummm...definitely me! But I'm also a nursing mommy! When we first started dating I was always amazed by the amount he could put away, and now I think he just eats less than he used to (at least that's what I tell myself so I don't look like such an oinker)

3. Who said, "I love you" first? I did, but he said it right after me, we both really wanted to but we were scared!

4. Who is taller? He is, just enough so that I can wear heels and he is still taller.

5. Who is smarter? I wouldn't marry someone dumber than me! We are smarter than the other in different ways sometimes though, as in, I'm very gullible and will take things the way people tell me (sometimes) But I also pay attention to details and am more thorough and efficient about things. School wise we are both about equal, but he hated homework more than I did.

6. Who is more sensitive? Definitely me! Especially when I was pregnant and would cry if he looked at me the wrong way!

7. Who does the laundry? We both do, but we both hate it. I'm the one who always ends up folding it though, ok,not always but 99% of the time. And I do the ironing, which is weird since I used to hate it but now I find it kind of relaxing.

8. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Me, but he wishes it was him. When we first got married it was always him, now that Lexi's crib is next to our bed, it's me so that I'm closer.

9. Who pays the bills? We both do! Actually our bank does. See, we just put the money in the bank and auto-pay does the rest :)

10. Who cooks more? Me! He can BBQ a mean steak, or country rib though.

11. Who is more stubborn? Growing up, I never thought I'd meet anyone more stubborn than me....that is until I married Kevin. The man puts everyone else to shame, it doesn't matter if he's dead wrong - if he doesn't want to, it won't happen!

12. Who is the first to admit they are wrong? See above for the majority of the time. Mostly it's me because I'm quick to get past things and want the fight over with already!

13. Who has more siblings? I do, Kevin has his twin Andrew and his half-sister Tracy. I have 3 bros and 2 sisters.

14. Who wears the pants in the relationship? My mom always said something when I was growing up - when Mamma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy - It's so true! So the answer would have to be that I wear the pants.

15. What do you like to do together? Everything - wait, I take that back, he hates going to football games and I love them, and I hate WOW. Other than that, everything! We watch netflix, the office, go for walks, we would go for drives but gas is expensive! We also work out together.

16. Who eats more sweets? Probably him, because people bring them junk food at work all the time! However, I drink Pepsi -I'm down to one a week! and I sooo look forward to it!

17. Guilty Pleasures? WOW , he loves that stupid game.

18. How did you meet? - The first time? At my best friend Bethany's wedding, I was with another guy and he thought I looked like trouble. Actual hanging out meet? I asked him to teach me kickboxing, so I went to his house 2 or 3x a week. I knew he liked me for me because he saw me all sweaty and grody before we even started dating!

19. Who asked whom out first? I did (wow, did I pursue him or what?) I invited him over for Thanksgiving, wait, no before that we went to dinner at Roadhouse(food is a big deal to us!)

20. Who kissed who first? He kissed me, we had been hanging out watching Family Guy, then he got up to go home. I had waited for him to kiss me all night, and he would get really close then not do it! so I thought he would after he hugged me, and he didn't so I went to pull away and then he pulled me back and kissed me.

21. Who proposed? He did.We had just gotten done talking to my parents, and he asked my dad for permission. He had already gotten the ring that day but I didn't know it. We left and decided to go hike Roxy Ann (at 7 pm in January!) He proposed at the top, you can see the whole valley and the sky was so clear, all the stars were out.

22. His best features and qualities? His sense of humor, he always brings out the best in those around him. His love of the Gospel, and desire to serve. He is the best Daddy to our little girl, he works hard at his job and comes home happy, and he manages to love me, even though I can be such a brat.

23. I tag: Everyone, and tell me when you do it so I can read them!

Family Photos

2008-10-23T21:29:00.000-07:00

Yay! Our family pictures and Lexie's 3 month pictures came back and they are so awesome! She is one of the most photogenic babies, but then again I am very biased. So here are a few just to tease, if you want to see the rest go to www.handsomeprints.net/onlinegallery then click on The Ludlows.
Also, I just broke a tooth! Like, literally, 10 minutes ago. It's one that needed some work done anyway (a cap) but since we filled out the paperwork wrong to add me on to Kevin's insurance, and now we can't until next open enrollment, it's going to cost at least $1200!! Well, now it's kind of a big deal, cause it hurts pretty bad! So I call my dentists office, and guess what? They are closed until Monday! But I called my dentists cell (it was on the machine, I don't have his number on my own!) and they can get me in in the morning. whew! You know, some women talk about how they wish they could change their hair, or their butt (reality, I want to change that too!) but if I could change one thing it would be my teeth. Sure, they look straight in the front, but behind the scenes they are a mess! I open my mouth and all you see is silver and it drives me crazy! Yeah, I know, I should have brushed better as a kid, but it's a little too late, and now, I can't stand my teeth. Note to everyone with kids - make sure they brush their teeth really early, otherwise you end up paying for it and they end up paying for it when they're 23 eating a potato chip and breaking their tooth. Really gross part, I think I swallowed my tooth piece - YUCK!

RUDE!

2008-10-06T12:12:00.000-07:00

I hung up on a telemarketer today. They call at work all the frikkin time and it is so annoying. They want us to come back to Qwest, they want us to start selling monkeys out of our lease space, they want us to install credit card machines so that our clients can pay us. Or like today, they want us to outsource our collections on delinquent accounts to them. Like I said, annoying. So I told this one no thank you, we handle our own accounts, have a good day, and I hung up – same as always. And then the dude calls back! And says I’m sorry we must have gotten disconnected, because I know you wouldn’t be so rude as to hang up on me! I said actually, I said no thank you, we don’t need your services and as I was hanging up he goes “here we go again!” really rude! And what a jerk to accuse me of being rude when he interrupted my day a SECOND TIME after I said no, with crappy services I don’t need!

Hell is for receptionists- oh sorry, Administrative Assistants

2008-09-23T12:02:00.001-07:00

I think that hell would be a place where I file over and over. Like, I have a stack of papers on my desk, I turn and file it in my rolling filer, turn back to my desk, and there is the same paper. Feeling dejavu, I turn and file again, only to return and have the same paper be there. There would be a feeling of frustration because you feel like you’ve done it before, but it’s foggy, so you don’t fully realize you did. You just feel spacey, as in “didn’t I just do this? Oh well, I’ll put it away now” It would just be constant frustration and annoyance, like a joke you don’t fully get, but the joke is on you.

Wasting time

2008-09-05T21:51:00.000-07:00

So I'm supposed to be putting together an itinary (is that how you spell that?) for our trip, ya know, the important stuff like where we are going and where we are staying and a budget, but I am distracted by all of my friends blogs and funny email and the lolcats on www.icanhascheezburger.com which is hilarious. Kevin is at a special event with Andrew and Phil, he won't be home until later, whenever that may be. Lexie is in bed, just sound asleep and hopefully I won't hear from her until about 2am, or dream of dreams she will sleep all night....ahhh someday, but not too soon either. I'm rambling and I really need to focus on this trip so that I can have something to present to Kevin other than freshly painted toenails and this picture
This is so me tonight....

more animals

New at this

2008-08-30T16:35:00.000-07:00

So in the way of having a family blog for just our little unit, we are basically blogging virgins, so bear with us! I have a feeling this will be mostly about Alexis, but we may pop in stories about us from time to time (life is more than her - wait, I lied, no it's not)