Potato Bug

So this morning while Sydney took her nap, Lexi and I went outside to play and pull weeds(which, to a kid I've discovered pulling weeds is like playing! Yay!) I'm really glad I was wearing gloves (in order to squish the unsuspecting but grody looking spiders that randomly run out) because then THIS came up out of the ground, like some freaky alien ant/bee/grasshopper.

It's called a potato bug, Jerusalem cricket, spawn of Satan, bald devil fetus and earth fetus - to name a few nicknames! They are basically pretty harmless, live under ground, and are omnivores, so both bugs and plants are on the menu.
So what did I do when I pulled up the weed and the potato bug came crawling out? What any normal (relatively) mom would do - I called for Lexi to come and look at it while I tried to keep it from disappearing back under the overgrowth and then potentially dig itself far far away from me! Lexi stared at it with a mix of interest and revulsion, but wouldn't get close enough to really look at it, so I ran into the house and grabbed a mason jar to trap it. Then she really looked at it and man was it interesting! Those things are so freaky looking, but I don't want her to have bug phobias, so I introduce bugs at every possible opportunity, along with teaching her how to squish the bad ones.
All of this leads to my story with the potato bug when I was 16. One summer I worked for a couple in our ward at their ranch, doing whatever they had for me - weeding, cleaning, hoeing, etc. Basically manual labor at its finest! One day I was weeding up this big patch of ground, when my hoe brought to light a potato bug! It wasn't like the picture, this one had been underground so long it turned into an albino, so it was very pale and HUGE, like 4 inches long I kid you not. Just like Lexi, I stared at it with fascination and revulsion, until I decided I needed to get back to work, and it was just going to keep grossing me out. So I chopped at it with my hoe, but it only separated the front from the main body and here is the super gross part - the head turned on itself and started ripping the body (the part with stripes) apart with these ginormous mandibles!! I almost threw up, but then just chopped it into little bits (sadistic I know, but it went against the laws of nature!) and covered it with dirt and went on about my day - not to really be thought about until we found another one this morning. To be nice, we let it go and covered it up with dirt, partly because I don't want Lexi to be sadistic and squish bugs just because they look gross, and also because I didn't want to throw up if it ate itself like the last time! Lexi then ran off to her sandbox and I decided I was done with weeding for the morning.

Happy Things

Since last night, and then all throughout this day, I have been thinking about things that make me happy. Isn't it funny how just thinking about the things that make you happy, can actually make you happy? It started last night, when Sydney woke up at about 10:30, so I got her a bottle and went in the girls' room to tuck her back in. As she lay there drinking her bottle with her eyes closed I rubbed her cheek, and then she reached up with both chubby little hands and just held my hand (pinky in the left, index with the right) just happy to be close. Of course I had to get her out of the crib and snuggle her for about 10 minutes after that! So I think that will start my list
1. Snuggling with my girls after they've gone to bed and are half asleep. I sneak in their room all the time and just watch them sleep, and I can never resist picking them up and rocking them.
2. Hanging out on the couch with Kevin with our legs wrapped up watching a movie, tv, playing a game, heck I don't care what we're doing as long as we get some 1 on 1 time!
3. Watching the girls learn new things, whether it's Lexi being able to jump off of something and not get hurt, or when Sydney learns a new babble or when she figured out how to play peekaboo.
4. Showing Lexi bugs for the first time - she thinks they are really cool now.
5. Doing my nails. I really enjoy being able to give myself a manicure and a pedicure - I like going to get them done too, but there is something really relaxing about the whole process when I do it myself.
6. Plucking eyebrows - weird, I know, but I like to pluck other peoples brows - not mine because well, it hurts and I always get a little obsessed with them.
7. Baths, but only in big tubs, like my sister Tiff's or in my parents claw foot tub. Any other ones just make me feel ginormous and chubby.

There are about a billion things that make me happy, but for now that's all I have time for, because it's late and I need to hit the hay - Oh! That's another one!
8. Clean sheets (which I just put on my bed) and a freshly made bed......ahhhh.....

What a day....and it's not even noon yet

You would think, that since I woke up facing this (fyi, I don't always have this many dishes, but I cleaned out my fridge and all the little science experiments growing in it).


And this


AND this (dirty cloth diapers to be washed and rinsed throughout the day!)


Not to forget these two, who require every second of my attention (unless I can distract them with food and Kipper the Dog....I love Kipper with all my heart)


All those things in mind, plus calling the dermatologist for Kevin and the other 1,000 little things I do all day, you would think that it would be horribly unfair for anything else to happen. And it was,oh it was unfair that Sydney decided to greet me with this when she woke up.




I was up at 7:30, showered and working on my medical transcription when they woke up at 9:15. They were both laughing and happy, so I left them alone until I was done with the chapter I was working on, so about 9:40 I went in to get them and was greeted by two smiling girls, one was clean and one was covered in poo - and laughing. Nary a tear or wail from her, she must have just felt better from getting it all out! So to keep my sanity, I laughed. And gagged. And opened the windows and grabbed the camera. Then I put them both in the tub and scrubbed em! Then I cleaned the crib and put all the sheets in the washer. And my husband wonders why he sometimes comes home to a house that's dirty. I think I really took those pictures as evidence of what I do all day!! Now that I've shared my days grossness with you, I must go finish cleaning. Ta!

Bain

Tonight I am feeling very sad. We took our dog Bain to the pound, and left her there. And when I say we, I meant me, because Kevin was at work and I had to go by myself. Just 5 months ago we picked her up from that same place. When we got her, I wasn't even planning on getting a dog, we had taken a bag of dog biscuits, paper towels and some other stuff for donating there, and decided to look around, and there she was this little ball of fat and fur - she was adorable, like all puppies are at first. I should have gone with my instincts on her though, I remember thinking she's kind of a loner, and not super enthusiastic like all the other puppies in her group. But she was the only all black one, and the sign said Boxer/Lab mix - and Kevin really wanted(wants) a black lab. So I paid the hundred bucks and took her home. As she started growing though, it became very obvious that she was not a boxer mix, but rather a pitbull/lab mix. I had a pitbull, and American Staffordshire Terrier if you will, named Tink the tank because that girl was solid! I also had to give that pitbull away, because my parents homeowners insurance wouldn't allow pits - only a couple companies do - I gave her to a friend with a pit of his own, and they got out of the yard and attacked his neighbors poodle. I loved that dog a lot, and she was wonderful with people, but she definitely had a pitbull nature - high small prey drive, dominant nature, very protective - I wouldn't say I'm prejudiced to them, but they are not the breed for me. Flash forward through housebreaking, learning not to bite, or steal the kids toys(never quite succeeded, she always managed to sneak them away)and the pitbull side of her started coming out. She trapped our little old neighbor between her car and garage and wouldn't let her by, she chased after Lexi in the backyard, and started becoming very territorial. All of this led to a phone call this morning to Kevin, saying "I think she needs to go to the pound" and Kevin saying, "I was going to call you and say the same thing." I miss her a lot already. I didn't have my footwarmer while I was doing dishes tonight, or have to remind her to go outside and do her business. Those that know me, know I've had a lot of dogs. Diz, Tink, Lani, and now Bain. Does this mean I'm not a good dog owner? Or is it the wrong breeds? Or just bad timing? Bain was the first dog that I felt I truly gave all I could to, time, energy, training, love, and it just wasn't enough to change her nature. Or was it my expectations of her? I just worried that she would get out and hurt someone, and now I worry that she will just linger in a kennel, wanting people to love her, but being to excited they will say she's too high maintenance or high energy for us. And wondering why we don't come get her. I don't have anything really witty to say right now, or endearing. I'm just sad.

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So close to going home....

Sorry to all who have been reading that I haven't written since after the surgery, pretty much anytime she's awake I'm holding her, or when she sleeps I sleep! It's kind of like having a newborn all over again! She is doing so well, she was able to have "clears" yesterday, so she got to have Jell-O and some juice, it's funny she's never had jell-o, and she loved it! She had this cute little pink mustache, since the spoon was a little too big for her mouth. They took the drain, or stint out of her tummy yesterday, I didn't get any pictures of it, since they (the surgeons) always come around pretty early and I never think of taking photos. So her - wound? slice? future scar? I'm not sure what to call it, but where they cut her open and where her stoma used to be is healing up really nicely. She has two places with stitches and they are different types. They are both internal though, so we can't see them. Her stomach has about a 2 1/2 inch cut, and it looks like the skin is pinched together on the outside, so it's just a long line that goes from the left side of her tummy to just a little past her bellbutton. The stitches for that will disolve in about 4-6 weeks. Directly under that is a little criss-cross cut, that was where the drain came out, they just took it out and it's been closing on it's own. Then, the stitches at her rectum are just inside, they basically took her intestine where it had been attached to her tummy, then pulled it down to her bum then stitched it in place. Those stitches are "permanent" they won't dissolve, but they will eventually work their way out (months? years?) and the scar in place will keep her attached. When we change her diaper you can see one little stitch sticking out, that's the only way you know what happened! She is completely off the IV meds, and going on Tylenol during the day, and Tylenol with codeine at night. She was able to eat solids, they said she can go back on her regular diet, but supplement with fiber so that her stools are soft, cause the last thing we want is strain and a potential ripped stitch *ouch*! They say that maybe we can go home today, but she needs to poop first after eating all those solids, so potentially not until tomorrow. We just want her to be 100% ok before we go off and try to do this on our own! So here are some more photos, you can always go to Kevin's facebook account to see more pictures.

Day after.....

Surgery was a success! We went back to see her (she didn't get out until about 5pm) and she had her eyes about half open, but when I held her hand she just squeezed and wouldn't let go for anything! When I would try to pull away she just held on tighter, it was so cute. She had a pretty good night, and actually slept for quite a long time, so I got to sleep for a long time! Here are the wires in her - 1)heart moniter attached to her toe 2)catheter, umm you know where! 3)she has two IV's, one in each foot, but only one is being constantly used. I think they are using the other one for her medicines 4)an epidural from her back and 5)an NG tube, for sucking up her stomach contents, that reduces inflammation and the risk of infection. Oh, I forgot, since this one isn't hanging out, she has a drain from her stomach where they stitched her colostomy closed. She still can't have anything to eat, since it will just get sucked back up through the NG tube, but she has a lot of fluids going on, and doesn't seem hungry. I gave her a couple small ice chips this morning (I LOVE hospital ice, Tiff and I call it pre-chewed ice, because it's so crunchy and yummy!)not for her to drink, but so that she could wet her mouth and throat since it was so dry and her coughs sounded so scratchy. she seemed a lot better after that. She is very attached to me, it makes it hard to leave and go back to the RMac house to take a shower and eat, since she cries when I'm not there. Kevin is holding her right now and she's sleeping, I think if she had it her way she would just have us hold her all day and night. Oh, and she pooped!! It really hurt her, I felt so bad, but it wasn't an actual food poop, just what was left in her bowels going the restof the way through. She's been tootin all morning though, and it's really so bizarre to hear it from her! Kevin and I just look at eachother and go, "was that you?" because we forgot already! I have pictures of her after the surgery and just hanging out now, but i forgot the cord at the RMac house, so I will post them later tonight.